Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Panties = found
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
