when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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