And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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