What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize