for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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