Even the bartender felt bad for me
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
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