You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
