You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
