I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize