Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.