That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize