we're blogging at a bar
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
