As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
