oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
