do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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