everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
