Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize