So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
it's like iHOP with fire
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
