RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
