This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
her facebook's as public as her vagina
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Randomize
