Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize