Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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