god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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