if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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