talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Randomize
