I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I could make wine with my vomit
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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