yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
