KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
