just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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