I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
