i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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