I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Small penises have feelings too.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
