I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
you have to choose: penises or morals?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
