In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
