ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
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