i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
