At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
