google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
