you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
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he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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