She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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