At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Just puked most of my soul out..
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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