Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
