So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
