Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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