have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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