You're so nebulous sometimes
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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