Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
So vagazzling was a success
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
