My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
