Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
pray to the hookup gods
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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