I think I won the penis lottery.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
