Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
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Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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